The Way We Was: 1996 Week 49

Jamie Lithgow

‘Tis the season in 1996! December has begun and Turbo Man is the toy every boy wants for Christmas. Well, at least it is in Arnold Schwarzenegger’s new movie; Jingle All The Way. 20 years on and Arnie’s masterpiece has become a Christmas classic, but who cemented their place in history on Raw and Nitro in this week’s The Way We Was

90s Raw Logo

Realising they need some heat for their next PPV main event, the WWF have turned to house shows to help increase interest in Sid vs. Bret

Realising they need some heat for their next PPV main event, the WWF have turned to house shows to help increase interest in Sid vs. Bret

This week’s Raw was, to put it mildly, shit. The only significant development to report actually occurred at a house show in London, England, the previous week. We merely saw the somewhat grainy footage of this incident on Raw.

Following last week’s angle involving Bret Hart, Owen Hart, Steve Austin and The British Bulldog, the WWF have inserted Sid into the equation too. During a match between the WWF Champion and Stone Cold, The British Bulldog saw fit to get involved and extract some revenge on Austin after last week’s events. The problem for Bulldog was that interference caused Sid to be disqualified. The Champ was not amused and attempted to powerbomb Bulldog before Bret Hart – who Bulldog saved last week – returned the favour. The number one contender then entered the ring to square off with Sid, but the Master and Ruler of The World chokeslammed The Hitman to end the segment. In subsequent backstage interviews everyone involved claimed to be hard as fuck, with Bulldog – who is still a heel – claiming that he “has his reasons” for appearing to save babyface Bret Last week. His partner Owen – who was present during the earlier angle too – encouraged Bulldog to get his mind back on Tag Team wrestling. This is a tangled web…


In Other News From Raw –

  • Shawn Michaels cut the same promo as last week, only this time he said it with a smile on his face and phrased it in a more polite way. The upshot was that despite having long hair, a tattoo and a bellybutton piercing, he is still “a man’s man”. HBK did add a little extra spice with one of his closing remarks though. In reference to those who don’t think he’s a good role model – ahem, Bret Hart, ahem – he challenged them to be as open and honest as him and reveal some of the “skeletons in their closet”…
  • Vince McMahon appeared to admit to owning a dreadlock toupee
  • Speaking of wigs – and as if a gimmick couldn’t get any worse – Fake Diesel now has the worst hair extensions in the world. His hair is naturally curly, but these extensions are straight. On the bright side, they are right colour and he and Fake Razor Ramon will challenge for Owen and Bulldog’s Tag Titles at In Your House 12
  • Vince McMahon finally acknowledged that Uncle Zebekiah is nothing more than the WWF’s answer to Yosemite Sam
  • Jesse James’ push – if you can call it that – may well be over. He was flattened by Justin Hawk Bradshaw after Uncle Zeb distracted him. The Real Double J has challenged the pair to a handicap match next week as a result
  • Flash Funk debuted a new finisher; a kind of reverse Harlem Hangover i.e. a top rope summersault leg drop, only he starts backwards as if setting up for a moonsault. It did not look good
  • Next week’s Raw sounds good; The Undertaker will face Mankind in a no disqualification match
  • The hype for the Royal Rumble has begun with a promo featuring two stereotypical wrestling fans – i.e. losers – staking out their seats at the Astro Dome seven weeks in advance. So this is what the WWF thinks of their fans…
  • After getting on the same page last week, bad guy Billy Gunn left fellow dickhead Hunter Hearst Helmsley to fend for himself against Jake ‘The Snake’ Roberts and Marc Mero. There’s no honour amongst thieves and all that
  • Jerry Lawler Todd Pettingill subbed for Mr. Perfect (no longer with the company) and Sid (couldn’t be arsed) in the Karate Fighters tournament. I think Jerry won, which was stupid because he was subbing for Perfect
  • Vince McMahon was in full ‘embarrassing Dad at a wedding’ mode during Flash Funk’s entrance, which brings us to our quote of the week…

Quote of The Week

“Come on King, shake that thang!”
Vince McMahon, while dancing in his chair


Full Results

  • Flash Funk defeated The Goon
  • Diesel defeated Phineas Godwinn
  • Justin Bradshaw (w/ Zebekiah) defeated Jesse Jammes
  • Jake Roberts & Marc Mero defeated Billy Gunn & Hunter Hearst Helmsley

Nitro Logo

Sting picks Rick Steiner for his softball team

Sting picks Rick Steiner for his softball team

After Sting reverse DDT’d Rick Steiner last week, Nitro opened with a rather animated Dog-Faced Gremlin, who was accompanied by his brother, Scott. Rick called out Sting, while Scott reminded The Stinger that they are supposed to be friends. Half way through the show they basically repeated the same segment, only this time Sting appeared in the rafters and nodded in acceptance of Rick’s challenge. The ‘match’ between the pair headlined the show. I’m using punctuation because this wasn’t really a match; the bell never rang and it ended in a no-contest. To start off Sting turned his back to Rick and invited his former friend to hit him. Surprisingly babyface Rick did not hesitate and clobbered The Crow lookalike. After Scott manhandled Sting to throw him back into the ring, The Stinger took control. We then got a repeat of Sting’s segment with Lex Luger a few weeks ago. Sting handed Rick a baseball bat and invited a clobbering. Again, Ricky was well up for it until Scotty stopped him. Sting disappeared into the crowd as Nitro went off the air. He’s a man of mystery this Sting fella…


In Other News From Nitro –

  • The New World Order welcomed Sting into the group, despite the mystery man being the proverbial closed book and no actual evidence to suggest such a union being provided
  • It was a quiet night for the nWo. Bischoff, Hall and Nash did take over commentary for the second hour, but no members wrestled, Hogan was missing and there was barely a mention of the group for the first hour of the show
  • The only mention of the Hogan/Piper feud was Bischoff hyping how Hogan has run some of WCW’s biggest stars out of town. We saw footage of attacks on Ric Flair, Macho Man and – from last year – his match with Vader. Take that WWF!
  • Glacier is back, from wherever he’s been, and he has a new look and new music. Good for him
  • Arn Anderson endorsed Roddy Piper in his feud with Hogan. He made reference to next week’s Nitro which will hail from Charlotte, North Carolina. That’s certainly not nWo country…
  • Speaking of The Horsemen, Anderson said that the group will step up as leaders for WCW. Chris Benoit then reassured his stable mates that Woman’s absence is due to “Horseman business” and nothing else. Debra then chimed in, apparently she doesn’t like Woman, or as she called her, “Nancy”
  • The slow and steady push of Lex Luger continues. He battered both members of Public Enemy
  • In response to Chris Benoit’s promo last week about their match in Baltimore, Kevin Sullivan said that he beat The Crippler physically but that Benoit mentally beat him later that night. Apparently “this equation now equals three”. Nobody has said it out loud yet, but the heavy implication here is that Kevin Sullivan is married to Woman (which has never actually been acknowledged on TV) and that Chris Benoit (who Woman manages) is sleeping with her. This is a storyline, for now…
  • Despite the general shoddiness of the nWo’s commentary during the second hour, they did put over the likes of Eddie Guerrero, Scott Steiner, Chris Benoit and Steven Regal
  • Speaking of Mr Benoit and Mr Regal, the latter cut his forehead after head-butting The Crippler very early in their match. The rest of their bout was shown from a very wide angle

Quote of The Night

“What’s the name of this guy with the hair?”
Bobby Heenan

“I don’t even know, nobody told us”
Tony Schiavone in response


Full Results

  • Glacier defeated Hardbody Harrison
  • The Amazing French Canadians (w/ Col. Rob Parker) defeated Joe Gomez & The Renegade
  • The Faces of Fear defeated Robert Gibson & Scotty Riggs
  • Kevin Sullivan defeated KC Sunshine
  • Dean Malenko defeated Billy Kidman
  • Jeff Jarrett defeated Big Bubba (w/ Jimmy Hart)
  • Eddie Guerrero defeated Dave Taylor
  • Arn Anderson defeated Jim Powers (w/ Teddy Long)
  • Chris Benoit defeated Lord Steven Regal in a WCW US Championship Tournament Quarter Finals match
  • Lex Luger defeated Rocco Rock (w/ Johnny Grunge)
  • Sting vs. Rick Steiner (w/ Scott Steiner) ended in a no contest

Ratings

A small, uniform rise for both Raw and Nitro this week. Could it be because San Francisco blew out the Atlanta Falcons 34-10 on The Monday Night Football…?

You can read all previous ‘The Way We Was’ pieces here.

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One thought on “The Way We Was: 1996 Week 49

  1. Pingback: This Week in Wrestling 2016 week 50 | Ring the Damn Bell

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